Non-Crafty Crafter


How do like me now?!?

I blame it on my Mom. She was kinda crafty. She quilted, she cross-stitched, she canned, and somewhere in the back of my mind I think I may have this tendency to believe that I should be crafty too. Sometimes I even give it a good try, like my self-tailored strapless of 2001, but most of the time my best attempts just don’t pan out.

As such, I’ve had to develop a few guidelines for myself. The following are my helpful hints for the non-crafty crafter:

1. Stay off Pinterest. It will only give you a complex.
2. If you must pretend to be crafty, keep it simple. Aim for maximum effect with minimum effort. (ahem, skill.)
3. When you do succeed, CELEBRATE.

Grab a cup of whatever is closest and heartily toast your own achievement. Take 1001 pictures and force feed them to your friends. (For reference, see my bridal shower decorations featured above.) Then lastly, grant yourself just a little time for some good ol’ fashioned gloating. (For further reference, just keep on reading.)

“How do you like me now, elementary art class attempts!?!”
“So there sad classroom bulletin boards of 2007.”
“Shove it face painting fiasco of 1998.”
“Take that wreath-making efforts of 2012.”
“And every botched, burned or otherwise buggered recipe I’ve ever tried, you can go ahead and bite me. Today, I win!”

Oh, my mom would be so proud. Or, at very least, I hope she’d laugh.

This week, whatever the challenge is that you are facing, may your silliness see you through until at last success can be celebrated.

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